Hi there,
Hope you’ve had a healthy 2023 so far, despite all the challenges we’re all facing. It’s been a while since I posted here, and I’ve missed reaching out to you. But for now, let me explain what’s been going on.
The main development for me has been a realisation – one I now have a clearer view on the kinds of people I can best serve using Cognitive Hypnotherapy.
Recognise any of these difficulties?
- Shyness or social anxiety
- Limiting self-beliefs around not being good enough
- Putting off applying for a job or going for a work promotion because you don’t feel you’re quite ready. You believe doing one more course and you will be ready.
- Nervous to speak up in work meetings or give a presentation, or feel nervous speaking in Zoom or Teams meetings.
- Nervous when meeting people in authority whether they are clients of yours, senior work managers or when meeting highly qualified people.
I don’t like people giving each other labels like imposter syndrome, procrastination or low self-confidence because labels can attach themselves to our identity – and that’s not a good thing.
But all of these different problems, which can lead to difficulty in showing up and speaking up confidently, deprives the world of all of your wonderful talents.
I’m serious. The world is poorer for you keeping yourself small, staying safe and avoiding times when you could make a difference. Others less fortunate need you.
One final point on this, which might sound quite depressing: imagine yourself in your last few years of life, reflecting on your younger self, things you did, things you didn’t do. What might have been.
Not a great feel, is it?
That’s where I can help and here’s the hard bit for me personally. Gulp. The list above isn’t taken from clients I’ve worked with – no, what you read is me. This is who I was.
Safe, quiet, ‘nice’. A pleasure to teach, someone at my school told my parents.
So, what happened?
Well, I sought help and worked hard at changing myself. It’s easy to write down now but the journey was a bumpy one. Self-doubt. Fear. Worry.
But the outcome of this journey was realising I could have changed my life sooner had I reached out and asked for help.
But help is available, it truly is.
Nowadays, I get frustrated if I don’t get a chance to stand up and give a presentation. I can’t even believe I’m writing that, knowing how I used to be.
Now, I describe myself as a high functioning introvert – I can switch on and perform but still need that rock to crawl under to recharge my emotional batteries.
And so can you – or someone you know and care about.
The final piece of news is the one I’m really happy about – I’m in final manuscript stage for my new book, The Shyness Myth.
This isn’t a book about me but one that aims to bring fast forward any of my learnings and experiences to help those wanting to show up and speak up. Ordinary people. Self-doubting. Frustrated. Angry. Ashamed.
I’ll let you know when it’s available!

The mantra I now live my life by is that each and every one of us, matters. I’d like to think I can play a part, even a small bit, in making the world a happier, more fulfilled place to live. Goodness knows we need anything positive to cling onto right now.
I look forward to sharing more in the coming weeks but I’d love to hear from you – how life could be even better for you.
Have a great week and take care.
Steve x
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